Bunker, Dolimo

Parents: Paul Bunker, Yolanda Palmira

Dolores Imogena Esta Giovanna Orsola Loandra Bunker, self-fashioned Dolimo Bunker, a.k.a., The Dolum, Trad-Latin Dolum Imo Esta Bunker, nick named Geni Os (impersonal) and Lo (personal), was born at the fourth hour, on the fourth day of the week, on the fourth month of nineteen seventy four, to English father Paul Bunker and Italian mother Yolanda Palmira, Azorio, Northern Italy.

Dolimo Bunker was known from a young age to be an exceptionally bright girl, ever since she first picked up a counting set at the age of three weeks old. Her first word was 'Genius' after she heard her parents talking endlessly about her to the neighbours. It was then that the young Dolimo decided to become a genius when she grew up.

​Dolimo was 'nannied' from the age of three, by none other than Bella Ravinelli, ironically, her current next door neighbour. From the age of five up until the age of ten, Dolimo attended Brighton Young School, where she became fast friends with Daphne Mayo, who eventually followed her to university. At school, Dolimo was noted for being an exceptionally bright young student at all levels, but showed her greatest potential in the world of mathematics. Dolimo is famous for having been expelled from that school for being 'too clever'.

Dolimo was home-schooled for a year until the age of eleven by Margi Bothe, who was a great academic and moral inspiration for Dolimo. At eleven, she was accepted into the prestigious Rodean Girls School in Brighton, England. In the same year, her father was offered a senior lecturer position with the mathematics department at the University of Oxford. The family bought a posh, regency townhouse on Brighton seafront where Dolimo attended school, and which was in easy reach of Oxford.

Dolimo had a hard time at school. Bullied for being bright, she had no friends and retreated into a fantasy world where dresses emanated musical sounds and mathematics formed the basis of social populous and fashion trends. Dolimo became so good at predicting the next fashion trends at school, simply by using mathematics, that she was almost passed as someone who might be 'cool' and a popular person to hang out with.

Dolimo passed her GCSE Mathematics and Sciences with A* in year nine, two years before the rest of her peers, and she attained A's for both A-Level Mathematics and Further Mathematics one year later. She spent the remaining two out of three years of her time at school devoted to further studies in mathematics.

In 1991, at the age of just seventeen, Dolimo Bunker attained a scholarship to study Mathematics at the University of Oxford, where her father taught. There, she attained one of the highest marks for a mathematics degree in the UK. In 1995, Dolimo embarked on a pHd in 'Independent Studies' at the University of London; the object of the degree to study whatever one wanted, the final goal being to create one's own subject. Meanwhile, her mother rented out the house in Brighton, and moved back to Azorio.

It was during these years that Dolimo Bunker created Isexes, the 'new maths subject'. In 1996, Dolimo's father bought her a three-storey regency townhouse next to a park in Sisorca, London. However, Dolimo spent a lot of time flying to and from Italy to visit her mother in Azorio, where the sea and sands gave her time and space to think properly. During one of her flights back to London, Dolimo's co-passengers stole her journal and burned it; the result being that Dolimo had to reconstruct all of her university notes from scratch. This incident was later deemed a 'blessing in disguise' because it forced Dolimo to re-evaluate her thinking patterns and Isexes would have never been the same had the journal still been in tact today.

Meanwhile, Dolimo funded her PhD by umpiring at Wimbledon tennis matches (replacing Ladderia Miner). Here she would sit on a tall seat on top of a ladder, wearing elaborate hats, and spinning batons around her forefingers and thumb. It was one hot summer's day, where Dolimo suddenly had a flash of inspiration, and she fashioned her own title, "The Dolum", as the bells of Big Ben chimed on the radio (in replacement of "The Laddier"). Dolimo created her title to sound Trad-Latin because she was always interested in the Romans and her Romanesque heritage; she used the Trad-Latin title and she wore white gowns embossed with gold jewellery to elevate herself to Goddess status. This was part of the process in which Dolimo began to be interested in the arts, and, in particular, fashion and music.

Dolimo, having discovered that she had a creative side (as well as a logical side) began to use the arts, and music, to promote maths. She paid several PR companies to advertise Isexes in schools around the UK where it became an instant hit, and at local villages around the UK, she was invited to cut open oranges in honour of her arrival. Nya Nya.

When she completed her PhD in 1998, Dolimo was already famous for having created Isexes: The New Maths Subject. She spent a couple of years teaching mathematics at Ignisborough Community College, but she had to raise her voice many times due to unruly children. When teaching ran dry and bitter for her, Dolimo released her first album entitled 'Webs, Triangles, Bunks and Dolls' which was an album that actively promoted mathematics in everyday life. It was an instant hit, and it turned Dolimo into a touring sensation. Dolimo's music style took influences as diverse as Ute Lemper, Josephine Baker and Madonna. She was a true diva, and she toured with her own big band.

'Webs, Triangles, Bunks and Dolls' was a jazz and swing based album containing swing numbers such as its title track 'Webs, Triangles, Bunks and Dolls', 'One, Two, Three, I Can Count', 'Summe Lux' and 'You Can Win On A Negative Chance', as well as more poppy numbers such as 'In The Morning' and a cover of the song 'Ruby Wine (Nikita It's A Cold...)' by the sensational seventies husband and wife duo Jonboy-Janni (Jon and Janet Culsor).

'Love Stars', the follow-up album, leant more towards pop than jazz, containing hit songs such as its title track 'Love Stars', 'Looking Thru', 'Inside', 'Song For the Elderly', 'Thunder Split Stars', 'My Song' and 'Path of Discovery', and world music compositions such as 'Moina Doo' and 'Ragaaya'.

Her third album, Manipulation, contained hit songs such as its title track 'Manipulation', 'Rainbow Days', 'Mary Ship' (which was the sequel song to 'Queen Mairie Fayre' from her first album), 'Susie Cannot Make It (To The Shop)' and the N'Veeran Research Project songs 'Fill Each Corner (With Light)' and 'Sylvia's Chant'.

During the years 1998-2001, Dolimo also sung with Sisorca Arts Jazz Ensemble (SAJE). She occasionally sings with them today, but only as a guest vocalist.

In 2001, Dolimo went into partnership with Daphne Mayo, who had followed Dolimo to London, and was now lodging in Dolimo's garden shed. The partnership was called the 'DolDaphne System'. The idea was that Dolimo chose ten rich men to yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaqaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Dolimo resides at 24 Museum Road, Sisorca. Her house is a white, Georgian regency terrace with three storeys and a basement. The ground floor has white, marble steps leading up to the front door.

The lounge walls are white with paisley flowers and a golden carpet. Around the perimeter of the lounge, there are white, leather sofas with gold frames. The walls are lined with bells, and in the middle of the lounge there is a grand, oak table with a glass top set about with ornate chairs. This is where Dolimo gives maths lessons to lucky students. The main staircase is on the right as you are walking into the lounge. Tucked behind it is a grand piano where Dolimo translates from mathematics to the manuscript.

At the back of the house on the ground floor is the kitchen. The kitchen decor is inspired by Dolimo's holidays in Chinisia, Cyprus, Turkey, Dubai and the Middle East, with terracotta tiles on the floor and counters and burnt orange paint on the walls. In the kitchen, there is an electric flat-top hob and extractor vat. The fridges have replenishing champagne racks filling up from the pantry. There is ample freezer space and facilities to produce crushed ice and even a cocktail bar. The dishwasher meshes double up as crockery and cutlery racks which can be lifted out of the dishwasher and exchanged for those in the cupboards. In the corner of the kitchen, there is an iMac on a stool, with Apps where Dolimo stores all of her recipes dreamt up from her days as CEO of The Dolum Marketplace Inc.

Outside, there is an Italian-style garden with trimmed hedges, fountains and tall cyprus trees. At the end of the garden, there is a small outhouse where Daphne Mayo resides. Recently, Dolimo has allowed Daphne a promotion to an actual room in the house (an old, disused broom cupboard) in exchange for double the rent. Daphne currently pays £1,600 per month (excluding bills and council tax), which, in Dolimo's opinion, is an unmissable deal.

Upstairs, there is an open-plan landing with a solar-inspired, east-facing window (so that the first rays of sunlight enter here and land on a marble replica of the zodiac on the facing wall). There are works of modern art and even a swirl, so that Dolimo can meditate. A passenger car takes visitors gracefully up the stairs, and lands them in a pile of futons, to enjoy live entertainment on a flat-screen, cinema-sized television.

There are three bedrooms on the first floor. The bedrooms to the back and sides of the house are devoted to the archive of costumes from the DolDaphne era (1997-2010). The bathroom is white, with a walk in shower that converts into a jacuzzi swimming pool. The bathroom is flanked by elegant, white Romanesque columns. The walls and floors are embossed with sea-shells from around the world, and the sink is a minimalist bowel poised delicately upon the work surface. The water coming out of the taps is foamy, and at body temperature, with settings for steam, shockice and brine (it pumps water directly from Cheltenham Spa, Gloucestershire).

Dolimo's bedroom is the master bedroom on the first floor at the front of the house, with west-facing windows overlooking the park. It has a beige carpet with white, coffered walls. The room is dominated by a dark-wood four-poster bed with sequinned curtains. The furniture is antique, and there is a portrait of William IV on the wall facing the window.

The second floor is the arts & crafts centre, with fabric workshops where Dolimo spins her yarn. Up here is also Daphne's room, which is tucked away behind the staircase. The stairs go up into the roof and lead onto a roof terrace. Daphne is allowed up there, but she has to book her slot in advance, and if she has booked and Dolimo wants to recline there, Dolimo has to take priority, even if Daphne is entertaining her own guests. Daphne believes that it is a great privilege, considering the affordable rent that she is paying. Dolimo is considering raising the rent next April, to allow her to cover some essential necessities.

Dolimo Bunker was currently one of three directors of DoLor, alongside Hayda Loral and her stalwart Chantal Rouge. While Hayda and Chantal specialised in the hair, lipstick, makeup and cosmetics (chemical) side of the business, Dolimo Bunker concentrates on clothes, shoes and elaborate accessories (physical). Dolimo Bunker has earned her reputation as a tyrant at work, who instills fear upon all who set foot upon her immaculately polished office floor. The directors' office is sectioned off from the main office, inside a glass box. Dolimo Bunker has a tendency to fire employees at short notice if they are not up to standard. Hayda Loral, on the other hand, spreads love and positive energy to all of her employees, who she treats as equals.

Dolimo Bunker's vice and personal assistant is Daphne Mayo, who takes care of all Dolimo's business and financial needs (i.e., pays for everything).

Dolimo Bunker, outside her posh, regency townhouse 24 Museum Road, which she has owned since the '90s.